Dear Anne,

In my shame, I want to thank you for being such a dear friend. You helped me to form a new life here in New York, one that has changed me in innumerable ways. I finally feel as if I can be myself and the connections I am making with people are unlike any I have had the opportunity to make before in my life. I no longer feel alone or self-conscious, and with your aid, I am beginning to learn more and more about the person who I am and the woman I want to become. When I needed somewhere to rest my head, you offered to me not only your shoulder, but your home as well. You have helped me to forget about the pain and bitterness that my departure from Naxos had caused me. On the days that I could no longer quench the memories of embarrassment and despair, you were there for me. You, like a true friend, forged for me a new opening within the New York that you call home. In you, and in Black Harlem, I have found comfort, and the suffocating sentiment of loneliness which once filled my life has evaporated into the Northern air. Through all of this, I want you to know that I cannot thank you enough. With my thanks, however, I cannot help but offer you my apology as well. I cannot explain to you why, after becoming such beloved friends, I still could not inform you of the situation which eats slowly though diligently at my soul as my days pass before me. I am disgraced at myself. Was I afraid you would not accept me had I told you I was half white? Did I think maybe the community that you had worked so hard to foster me into would be disgusted, taken aback? These suggestions very well constitute my downfall, though I recognize they are by no means excuses. Anne. My mother was white, my father black. I am ashamed of the whiteness beneath my skin, afraid to be associated with the cruelty and monstrosities of those “sinister folk”. It was the evil demon that overtook the life I led before New York, and I believe part of me was no longer willing to carry its heavy weight upon my back. I know this is no excuse for deceiving you, and Dear Anne, I cannot apologize enough. Please forgive me.

Forever Sorry,

Helga